Wednesday, 29 August 2012

The Moonstone 4: THAT'S IT

This post is part of a readalong. In fact, it's the last post, so it will contain ALL the spoilers.

I am happy and also sad.

(My emotions are in such a state that I'm not going to adhere to any sort of structure in this post, opting instead to yell my reactions at you.)

We did it! We solved the Moonstone! And you know what? We were right from the START. (Not really, but let's take credit for it anyway, shall we? We shall.) Mother effing freaking GODFREY. You cannot trust a guy who's so chummy with all the Clacks in London. Something is up, there. The fact that Franklin literally handed him the diamond does not make him any less scoundrelly. I would really like to know more about his secret life, secret house, and secret layday.

The reveal scene where Sergeant Cuff rips off the dead man's wig etc is MASTERFUL. The fantastic Gooseberry acted as our faithful commentator, because Franklin, he is too fragile for that shit. Also I'm sure he was still hungover from the opium, and you don't want to be looking at corpses with an opium stomach. And then the double reveal with the name in the letter and AH. So good.

And hey, look at that, by the end of it all we found our Marian-equivalent in terms of sheer stupendousness and ninja-like qualities: Gooseberry! Or, as I shall call him henceforth, Gooseberrrrrrrry! I love him and his crazy eyes. He, like Marian, is stronger than you expect, and stronger than many a man in the same situation. I REALLY love how Sergeant Cuff foretells Gooseberry's future as a genius detective.

"The suspects name is ... Abby something ..."

HEY. I just realized something. Some of Wilkie's best characters, certainly the ones I get most attached to, have some physical feature that makes them abnormal: Marian (unfortunate face), Ezra Jennings (cray-cray hair and unpopular skin colour), Gooseberry (googly eyes) ... NEED I GO ON? I need not. I think Wilkie, having an extraordinary feature himself, gave comparable features to his really special characters. And having those features allowed for character development (in Marian and Ezra, at least) that couldn't have happened otherwise. Because when you're beautiful the world treats you differently. I don't know. Thoughts? 

Oh, my pudding pops, this post could go on for ages. The opium experiment. Franklin and Rachel getting back together. The death of poor Ezra *SOB*. The clear romance between Ezra and Mr. Candy ("Kiss me!"). Most importantly, Wilkie gave the Moonstone back to the Indians.

Classy move, Wilkie.

All in all, a romping good time. Moar readalongs, for future! What's next, bloggerkins?


  1. Yes the unfortunate looking bunch being awesome! I definitely agree with the 'the world treats you differently when you're beautiful' thing, and it's like, there's no impetus to be interesting or smart or anything cause people will let you get away with everything. Like the 30 Rock episode with Drew being in the pretty bubble, you know?

    Erhm. OBVIOUSLY it was Godfrey. Stupid Godfrey. Genuinely hated him from the start! ARGH WILKIE WHY ARE YOU SO GOOD?!

    Next readalong- The Grapes of Wrath! It will be less funny! But still fun! (I hope...)

    1. EXACTLY. The pretty bubble. Exactly. Now, most importantly, who would John Hamm play in the Moonstone?

      Grapes of Wraaaath! We can make tragic things funny. I have faith. I am excited!

    2. Nice! Good call, Tika. He could even do Betteredge, I betcha. Or Ablewhite Sr. Or Jr! Play ALL the characters!

  2. "(My emotions are in such a state that I'm not going to adhere to any sort of structure in this post, opting instead to yell my reactions at you.)"

    That is my method ALL THE TIME. Obviously.

    Oh dude, good point. Gooood point. About the physical abnormality thing. Ugh Wilkie's so awesome. "Behold! As I am way more advanced than all my Victorian chums!" *we behold* Because they had that stupid-ass theory that your external appearance is a manifestation of your sin. Or something. So when Dickens has a dwarf (The Old Curiosity Shop) it is AN EVIL DWARF.

    Even Victor Hugo seemed confused by this, for all his general niceness. Because he was kind of like "Oh, well, the hunchback was kind of naturally terrible, BUT ALSO SORT OF NICE, but also kind of naturally terrible."

    I'd ship Ezra with Marian because SHIP ALL THE PEOPLE WITH EZRA, but Marian's all about Laura, so let's just leave them as they are I guess.

    (p.s. I have zero idea what we're doing after Grapes of Wrath but JOIN US FOR GRAPES OF WRATH)

    1. "Because they had that stupid-ass theory that your external appearance is a manifestation of your sin." YES. And Wilkie thwarts the heck out of that with Ezra, how everyone assumes he's shifty and evil because of his hair and general appearance. (I'M LOOKING AT YOU, BETTEREDGE. I am disappointed.)

      Ezra and Lucy, then? All the love for Ezra.

      RE: Grapes of Wrath - consider yourselves JOINED. This will be excellent.

    2. But Betteredge insulted him in just the funniest way so even though he was being a doucheface to Ezra (who wasn't a doucheface back, because he's the better person) it was still funny.

    3. It's true. I don't think even Ezra was upset by it. Just kind of stunned. "My head is ... what?"

  3. YES the double reveal!!! Wilkie is awesome.

    I think you may be on to something w/ Wilkie's love of giving the coolest characters some feature that makes them stand out. Although I loved Betteredge & can't remember if he had any off features about him, besides his overwhelming love for Robinson Crusoe.

    1. *ahem puts on professor hat* I think that the love for Robinson Crusoe is a foil for Clack's ridiculous interpretation of the Biblical mandates about converting people and Satan under the Tea Table. Because Betteredge uses Crusoe like a Bible, get it?

      I could write a paper about this, but I like our way of gifs and hilarity better.

    2. You're making a LOT of sense. Stop that. This is a readalong.

      In all seriousness, I can see how Betteredge's endearing/ridiculous adoration of Crusoe could be used as a commentary on the fallibility of trusting a book for guidance on everything. I suppose Betteredge is trying to convert people in his own way, just like Clack.

      HOWEVER, I'm sure if I used Wilkie's books to tell me what to do in a given situation, that situation would become a lot more awesome.

    3. You guys are good at this reading thing.

  4. Classy move, indeed Wilkie. I did not expect the Indians to get their diamond back. So happy it didn't end up back with Rachel even though she won me over by the end. But still, sacred stone should prob go back to sacred temple and not adorning rich girl's dresses.

    Good note on how the characters with some weird physical feature are THE BEST ONES.

    1. I am so happy, too! That would have been a terrible ending. "And the rich girl got her bauble back! Yayz!"

  5. I love your theory on the character features! It really does make sense. Also, I propose Marian/Ezra as our new readalong OTP, with them adopting Gooseberry. Yes/no?


    Oh, I totally noted Mr. Candy's "Kiss me!" moment, but then forgot to mention it in my post... Thank you for reminding me of that particular gem.

    P.S. Your GIF selection is superb, madam.
    P.P.S I see that you're reading Game of Thrones! Do you love it? Have you seen the show? /nosy

    1. I had to google OTP. I HAVE SO MUCH TO LEARN FROM YOU PEOPLE. Also, yes, absolutely. Marian + Ezra + Gooseberry + Betteredge to clean up after them.

      RE: P.S.: Thank you! I <3 internets.

      RE: P.P.S.: I am loving its FACE off. I'm usually scared of the genre because SO MANY CHARACTERS AND ALSO PAGES but this is soooer good. And I have seen the show! (I finished season one before I finished the first book. I couldn't help it. Best finale ever.) (Also, Wilkie's killing spree is NOTHING compared to Martin's!) Do you?! Have you?!

  6. *laughs at the phrase 'unfortunate face' for, like, an hour*

    Your use of gifs, I can't even.

    1. I think gifs are changing the very way I think. Also, I save pretty much every gif you post in my little gif hoarding folder.


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